Holidays, Money, Potato Salad

Last night Peter and I sat out in the yard and watched Princess Mononoke by our lonesomes. I had sent out a group email soliciting the company of pals for this outdoor screening, but people were either hella busy or exhausted by their weekend times. "I am feeling very unpopular right now," I told Peter as we were cleaning up after dinner. He laughed at me and shrugged his shoulders.

Princess Mononoke is awesome on the outdoor screen with the surround sound. The wind sweeping across the animated valleys, the thunder of giant animal god feet with a wolf-girl on a wolf's back, all of it sound great. Ozzie would come and lay at our feet and then rush to the back 40 as she heard some raccoon/animal god/tree spirit swishing around in the dark. Very fun.

So next Wednesday, pals, please do try to come for the 4th of July movie night. We will be barbecuing and looking forward to pals time. Peter will be choosing the movie night pick, and also the fireworks viewing is pretty killer from his deck. I mean, this is the night-time view from up there:


Last night I made super-yummy summer mealtimes of bratwurst (boiled in beer and onions and then grilled by Peter), corn on the cob, agurkasalat (cucumbers and onions in white vinegar and sugar), and potato salad. The potato salad came out really killer. Here is the recipe:

mayo
white vinegar
dijon mustard
sugar
salt
pepper
red onions, minced
roasted blue lake beans
boiled baby red potatoes
fresh chopped dill


If you want the exact proportions I will try to approximate them. Suffice it to say, it was delicious. Next time I may sneak in the veganaise instead of the olive oil mayo.

I woke up at 4:30 with low bloodsugar and sat in the living room eating granola with raspberries and reading San Francisco magazine and freaking out about the credit card debt I have accrued over the past six months, much of it due to stupid shit like buying expensive Anthropologie dresses for going out with Peter times and really expensive lingerie from that killer store on Fourth Street and also buying plane tickets, etc., I had not budgeted because I had not anticipated falling in love with a travelaholic.


Of course I do not regret any of the traveling (I have loved every minute of it), but I do somewhat regret the purchase of massively expensive bras and pantaloons, especially since only women ever notice these things, not men. Anyway at 4:30 in the morning when low blood sugar times rouse me from a sound sleep I begin to freak a little and when I come back Peter says "You're shaking, are you okay?" and I'm shaking because of the low blood sugar but also because I'm feeling anxious and want to be a good and lucrative partner for him and pull my weight as they say and right now I'm freaking out about finding more freelance work, even as I'm struggling to get in my next copyediting round on time. Bleah. Sometimes I think that living in MPLS in rental housing nicer than mine at half the price isn't such a stupid idea, and of course that's probably where I would end up if something disastrous happened with Peter and I decided I was tired of working it so hard out in the Bay Area and needed to be closer to family and a future pony and cheaper living through midwestern-ness.

Megan asked me this weekend just that question--what i would do if things didn't work out with Peter, and I told her that I'd move to MPLS and stable a horse at Ian and Emily's farm and hang out with my dad and Luci and have a baby on my own and try to enjoy my life. I know I'll be okay if Peter decides I'm really not the one he wants, but even as I write this I know I'm the one he wants, and he is the one I want, and I'm really not trying to write disaster scenarios into being by any means, but I do know that whatever comes my way, I'll get through it and it will be okay. That being said, I never want to be without Peter. We have gone through a tremendous amount of hard shit in the past six months and we have gotten through all of it admirably, swimmingly, gracefully. He makes the hardest situations easier. And he makes the nice times even nicer. Peter: He makes everything better.

In conclusion, please come over on the 4th of July and eat potato salad with us.